Entries from August 2007 ↓

Do you see what she did here? Do you? She ditched the horrible sparkly magenta under-eyeshadow and then went from two feathers to….. 83 feathers. I’d like to say it’s an upgrade, because that makeup was unbelievably horrific, but just look at all those goddamn feathers! (I will say, though, that at least they are matchy-matchy with her cute little red leather jacket and the pants are fun with those metal stud things.)

But anyway, this is just proof that she reads Scandelirious and is playing a little joke on me. Well, ha ha Juliette, you’re the one wearing a Native American meets Egyptian meets Las Vegas showgirl headdress, the joke is on YOU.

And she also might not be single.  Sorry, fellas.

Ever the comedian, Bill has us laughing even while doing something most would find sad and shocking. It’s probably the fact that he was riding a golf cart. I mean really, how could you be upset with Bill Murray?

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I have a soft spot for Julia Stiles, probably because 10 Things I Hate About You was one of the most defining movies of my teenage years and she played a very sassy, articulate, “don’t fuck with me” type of character with a large vocabulary. I’m a sucker for sassy people with large vocabularies.

Anyway, as much as I love her, she seems to look so sad in most photos, so I’m happy to share these if only for the fact that she’s smiling and her hair is down. Because she has pretty hair and she has been keeping it up for most of the Bourne premieres as of late. Verdict’s still out on the dress, though. The hippie in me wants to love it, but I just don’t know.

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Hello lovely readers. I thought you might like to see something yummy today, since I seem to be drawn to the weird news and strange-looking people in the world of celebrity gossip.

Christian Bale is neither weird nor strange. Just really, really good looking. Keep in mind, though, that Scandelirious will only reimburse the cost of new underwear purchases made at Wal-Mart.

Before today I really just passed Pete Doherty off as a gross looking addict set on self-destruction. And I’m fine with self-destruction so long as it’s not my own, in fact I often applaud other people’s self-destruction because it gives me more to write about.

But when you start endangering animals - especially kittens - I get really, really pissed off.

His adult cat – named Dinger, junkie slang for a syringe – recently had a litter of five kittens. When one of them fell ill, a worried vet tested the sick kitten and found cocaine in its bloodstream.

RSPCA spokesman Julie Stainton said: “It is a police matter, so we cannot deny or confirm the identity of the man who had his kitten removed. But it is very important to protect animals from substances that can do them serious harm.”

Lock him up! Take him to rehab! Paris Hilton may have her little dogs but the worst I can see her doing is blowing pot smoke in their faces, that’s probably just amusing more than anything. But kittens eating cocaine is a serious problem!

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Hopefully it’s for a movie, though the last thing the world needs is another movie fronted by a woman whose one facial expression is a stony botoxed glare with pursed lips, but I wouldn’t doubt it if she really just walked into the salon and asked for this. She probably thought that by getting something reminiscent of Victoria Beckham’s haircut that she, too, could be a fierce fashionista. But the’s wrong. She really just looks like Demi Moore circa 1985 and that is never a good thing. This haircut reminds me of all the reasons why I strongly dislike Renee Zellweger.

Here’s Michelle Pfeiffer in Esquire UK’s September 2007 issue. Looking at photos of her makes me very pro-plastic surgery or whatever magic cream she’s using. But it’s probably a combination of plastic surgery and botox. Which normally makes me wary, but when I see pictures of Michelle, however photoshopped they are, I think, “Damn, I want to look that hot when I’m 67!”

(Actually she’s 49.)

Isn’t it kind of rude to put a woman who is perfectly fertile and chooses to neglect her ovaries on the cover of a magazine for women who wish desperately that they could get pregnant?

But we still love her. She may not be the most amazing actress in the world but she is talented and seems like a really nice and grounded person in real life. There’s a chance I could be biased because I went through a pretty major Buffy the Vampire Slayer phase….

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