Julia Roberts is handicapped by douchiness

Oh, Julia - why did you do this? What would compel you to be such a douche? Was there a fire? Bloody orifices? Only douches park in the handicapped spot when they are not in fact handicapped. I suppose I could crack a joke about how her idiocy has rendered her handicapped, but usually she seems so down to earth and sensible.. but there’s just no excuse for this kinda crap. No excuse. Julia Roberts, you have made everyone at Scandie quite disappointed-face today.